Queerness is that thing that lets us feel that this world is not enough, that indeed something is missing.
Apparently I do this thing lately where I fall asleep & half an hour later wake up with an anxiety attack & need to find some sort of way to calm myself down before I can attempt to go back to sleep. This is srsly driving me crazy.
On the bright side an anxiety attack is still not a panic stack.
So that’s good.
Today I was bored and felt gross.
Sorry if this makes anyone feel the same.
Unfortunately, the people who are supposed to love us aren’t always able to give us the kind of love we need. Whether they are our mothers or our fathers, our grandparents or our siblings, some family, no matter how good their intentions, leave us feeling empty, invalidated, uncared for, and alone. And on the days when that pain becomes too much to bear, our work is to recognize that those people whose love we so desperately pine for are never going to be able to meet our needs. Not because they don’t care, but because they can’t change who they are.
Their scant affection isn’t a reflection on our worth. It isn’t even about us. It’s about them and their own limitations and struggles. It’s about their unique way of expressing love and the fact that it doesn’t match up with our own. And we don’t have to internalize that. What we need is to start reaching out to the right people. We need to create a family of people outside of our family. People who can meet our needs and reciprocate our love.
We need to appreciate our families for the ways in which they are able to show they care, and be accepting of the ways they can’t. We need to make peace with who they are and if necessary, we need to give ourselves permission to let go. We need to know that our worth isn’t something another person’s love can give or take away. We need to trust that with or without their affection, we are enough.
Daniell Koepke (via internal-acceptance-movement)
so relevant with holidays coming up(via lotrforlyfe)
If you are silent about your pain, they’ll kill you and say you enjoyed it.
[kicks your door in]
YOU ARE DOING YOUR BEST WITH THE CIRCUMSTANCES GIVEN TO YOU AND IF ANYONE TELLS YOU DIFFERENT THEY ARE WRONG YOU ARE DOING GREAT AND I LOVE YOU AND I’M VERY PROUD OF YOU AND I BROUGHT YOU YOUR FAVORITE FOOD [aggressively slams down food container on the table]
Of course, this is one of the profound ways in which oppression works—to mire us in body hatred. Homophobia is all about defining queer bodies as wrong, perverse, immoral. Transphobia, about defining trans bodies as unnatural, monstrous, or the product of delusion. Ableism, about defining disabled bodies as broken and tragic. Class warfare, about defining the bodies of workers as expendable. Racism, about defining the bodies of people of color as primitive, exotic, or worthless. Sexism, about defining female bodies as pliable objects. These messages sink beneath our skin.
this video keeps me young
I CANT FUCKING BREATHE
I NEED WHAT SHE HAS
o m g